Thursday, April 16, 2009

Are You From Licking County?

You might be from Licking County if any three items from the following list apply to you:

1) Your mailbox looks like it was hit by a snowplow (which probably was).

2) Your neighbor’s favorite roofing material is a blue plastic tarp.

3) You are fully prepared (in fact, you expect) to live without electric service for 6 weeks of the year.

4) You count local gossip as the mainstay of available entertainment.

5) You know seven ways to gut a deer.

6) You find yourself driving city-ward weekday mornings and rural-ward weekday afternoons.

7) Your favorite color is plaid.

8) You personally know at least half a dozen farmers.

9) You recognize Blackhand Gorge as a place rather than a medical condition.

10) You’ve bought the hoakum the county engineer put out about potholes being intended for a traffic control.

11) You habitually check your mobile phone’s signal strength before attempting a call.

12) You and all the dogs that live within five miles of your place are on a first name basis.

13) A tree goes down and your first thought is to estimate how many cords of firewood just set itself down for cutting and splitting.

14) You used to get a lot of “snow” on the screen when your television signal was poor—now, with the improvement of digital transmissions, you get a lovely slideshow of impressionist artwork before the little dancing icon says, “No Signal….No Signal….No Signal….”

15) Your tool-of-first-resort, for any repair project, is duct tape.

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